picture-perfect smiles fading....

Softly we tremble tonight,
picture perfect fading smiles are all that's left in sight,
I said I'd never leave you'll never change
I'm not satisfied with where I'm at in life.

Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price.
Am I supposed to be happy?
With all I ever wanted, it comes with a price.
You said, you said that you would die for me.

We made plans to grow old,
believe me there was truth in all those stories that I told.
Lost in a simple game cat and mouse are we the same people as before this came to light?

Am I supposed to be happy?
with all I ever wanted, it comes with a price.
Am I supposed to be happy?
with all I ever wanted, it comes with a price.
You said, you said that you would die for me

You must live for me, too...
For me too...yeah, yeah
You said that you would die for me

Am I supposed to be happy?
with all I ever wanted, it comes with a price.
Am I supposed to be happy?
with all I ever wanted, it comes with a price
You said, you said that you would die for me

cat and mouse by red jumpsuit apparatus.

lately i have felt so confused by men. growing up i used to think that men were so predictable and easy to critique. but now i feel like i was wrong all along. i can never seem to figure out what they are thinking or why they do the things they do. i feel as if my eyes and ears have been blotted out with confusion and lies leaving me with not but my thoughts. he said that he never wanted to lose me, but i fearly wonder if this is truely his plan of keeping me near...

i don't understand why such small-minded doubts cross his mind about me. i am the most honest person i have ever met and support everyone around me the best i know how. i know what it is like to cry myself to sleep because no one listens to my problems so i feel it is my duty to make others feel cared for and listened to. i dream of the day that someone will just be there for me no matter what, back me up when i don't agree with someone else's opinion. even if they don't agree with my opinion they still stand up for me because they love me and would do anything for me. i don't have anyone like that. i mean, i have so many friends but none of them would do anything for me. none of them would defend me against my enemies. none of them would buy me a frapaccino when i am having a bad day just to make me smile. :) none of them have empathy. sympathy maybe, but not empathy. no one cares about just listening. listening to no end, just because they love me.